By Gloria Omoruyi

HARMFUL traditional practices against women in most Africa’s cultural- traditional settings have not abated, despite criticisms and campaigns against them even as women continued to groan helplessly under such inhuman treatments. Many of those acts constitute an abuse of the rights of the women, yet they are condoned as customs or traditional order of things.

The effects of second burial rite on women of Tselukwu in the Aniocha North Local Government Area of Delta State, Nigeria and some other parts of the country is today perceived as violence against women in the name of tradition and custom.

When a woman is widowed anywhere in the world, it is natural for the woman to mourn the husband as a mark of final respect which she owes the deceased. However, among the people of Iselukwu, it goes beyond the woman just mourning the husband. According to tradition, the process of a second burial rite should be observed. Before it is carried out, the widow is taken to an isolated place or a confinement.

During this period, visitors are not allowed to see the widow. She eat her food without washing her hands and usually, the food is brought in broken plates to depict that she is unclean. She does not take her bath dress her hair or wear good cloths. She is only allowed to put on rags condemned cloths. The widow is expected to throw herself on the ground weep profusely morning and evening to show that she loved her husband and has respect for him; otherwise, she will be penalized because custom demands so.
Often, this second burial rite takes several years to conclude owing to huge financial requirements for the women. As long as a woman could not fulfill these rites or ceremony, she is not free to engage in any kind of affair involving another man. If she does, she has committed an abomination which attracts more derogatory penalties from the UMADA” (the female born of the community). The woman who flouts such traditions will pay fines both in monetary terms, elongation of the mourning period and performing of some rituals to “appease the anger of the husband’s spirit”

The same custom thrives among the people of Oguta Local Government Area of Imo State. Here, if the second burial of a woman’s late husband has not been performed, the widow is not allowed to trade in the community market or bath n the famous Oguta Lake (Uha mmiri). She is forbidden from shaving her hair. She remains unkempt as a sign of punishment.

Dr. Hajo Sani of the Society for Family Health (SF11) while speaking with Sheworid on such practices against women admitted that the challenges they pose are enormous. For her, one immediate solution is having an additional number of women lawmakers in the various State assemblies and at the federal level who could speak in one voice against such customs. According to her, religion, cultural attachment and illiteracy are factors that re-enforce those practices. The women are ignorant and cannot voice out their feelings or even say no to the custom. Such harmful traditional practices, she said, are more prevalent in the rural areas. She recommended advocacy for women and sensitisation of the custodians of such custom.

Sani however, identified “lack of fund as impediment to the drive with which concerned, well informed citizens would have pursued the abolition of such practices.” She urged the government to come up with programmes or sponsor a bill in the House of Representatives abolishing such practices while the custodians should be educated on the dangers and the harm such crude custom cause to women.
Mrs. Rose Ogbunuka, a poor widow from Iselukwu disclosed to Sheworid that she went through harrowing experiences when she had no money to carry out a second burial for her late husband. “I was not allowed to go to the farm, isolated and remained confined until my son who lives in faraway city came back and performed the second burial rite.” Mrs. Ogbunuka said she went through so much pains that at a time, she was wondering if she actually killed her husband.

The 1995 Fourth World Conference on Women which Beijing Declaration on the rights of women declared empowerment, advancement of women, including freedom of thought, conscience, religion and belie contributing to the moral, ethical, spiritual and in the women, individually or in a community with other guaranteeing them the possibility of realizing their society and shaping their lives in accordance with aspirations.

If these rights and privileges bestowed on women communities and societies elsewhere, surely, not in some our communities where women are usually amount to nothing as they could not fillfil the expectations of a second burial.

However, Mr. Eneberi, a native of Umutogwuma in Oguta Local Government insisted that it is no punishment at all to penalize any widow who engage in illicit affair or in confinement until the time of second burial. “It is our custom which must be upheld. A widow ought to show respect to the deceased at least that is the last thing she owes her dead husband” Chief Odafe Emmanuel, however, is not an exponent of this long standing traditional practice. He is happy with the way the custom is being modified today with the advent of Christianity which had, to a large extent, diffused such dehumanizing acts meted out to women in the past, all in the name of observing customs and traditions.

More so, the traditional practice is discriminatory. Widows who do not live in that community or who are rich are not allowed to go through those dehumanizing experiences. To this category of widows, the second burial rite is done quickly and afterwards, they return to the city where they continue their normal life. The wealth and affluence a widow command tend to tilt customs in her favour. The opposite obtains for an indigent widow. A rich widow is exempted from certain, activities and may not be present to carry out many of the rites. It is a popular saying among community members that “such a widow has used money to fulfill the expectations of tradition or custom.”

Chief Emetuche a high chief in Iselukwu disclosed to Sheworld that one effective solution, aside legislation in the efforts to stop this age long practice is to make an appeal to traditional institutions in the respective communities. If traditional rulers and their cabinet chiefs could be persuaded to understand the danger in those practices, they will put a stop to It.

He was of the opinion that government alone cannot do much to stop the practice because the people see government being too far from them; rather they would give listening eats to traditional chiefs.
One of the huddles to cross by those who want such practices abolished, Sheworid discovered will be stiff oppositions cong from the custodians who enrich themselves through payment of fines and other rites in the process of carrying out second burial rites. However, the issue has to be tackled otherwise poor widows will continue to suffer maltreatment.

A widow is going through so much psychological pains already for losing a dear husband, a friend and life partner. She needs help from everyone. But sometimes we sin in our hearts, claiming we are not contributing to the hardship but standing passively while custom maltreats women without trying to stop it. A total elimination of such practices requires greater efforts in terms of information advocacy and increasing public awareness. We must handle women and every human being with love and compassion while we observe traditions and customs.

Culled from the world magazine

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